Marriage God’s Way

How Can You Tell If He’s Mister Right or Mister Wrong?

After my divorce, I struggled to trust my judgment. I thought I knew what a good man looked like. My ex-husband provided for us, but I missed key warning signs that led to a painful divorce.

We were young—too young. He was 21, and I was just 18. I believed our marriage would last a lifetime, but back then, there wasn’t easy access to relationship wisdom like there is today. Ironically, now there might be too much advice, and not all of it is right! At that time, I wasn’t walking with the Lord, so I never thought to seek His guidance on choosing a spouse. But now, I know better.

After eight years of praying, I met my husband. I only asked God for two things: that he be a man of God and that he would sing with me in church. God provided both—and so much more. My husband is kind, giving, and has a beautiful heart. We’ve been together for 24 years, and we still laugh at the little things and love each other deeply.

So, how can young men and women discern if someone is the right partner?

LADIES: What the Bible Says About a Godly Man

A godly man should:

• Love sacrificially, just as Christ loves His people. (Ephesians 5:25)
• Be self-controlled, gentle, responsible, and a strong leader in his home. (1 Timothy 3:2-4)
• Love without harshness or resentment toward his wife. (Colossians 3:19)
• Be known for integrity and leave a legacy of righteousness. (Proverbs 20:7)
• Display the fruits of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23)
• Most importantly, share your faith and values in Christ.

These traits don’t guarantee a perfect marriage, but they create a solid foundation—especially when both partners are fully committed to the Lord.

GUYS: What the Bible Says About a Godly Woman

A godly woman should:

• Be trustworthy, supportive, and bring good into her husband’s life. (Proverbs 31:10-12)
• Speak with wisdom and kindness, not harshness or recklessness. (Proverbs 31:26)
• Value inner beauty and character over outward appearance. (1 Peter 3:3-4)
• Be loving, self-controlled, and have a heart for her home. (Titus 2:3-5)
• Strengthen her home rather than causing strife or division. (Proverbs 14:1)

Traits That Apply to Both

A godly spouse will:
✅ Love you as you are.
✅ Be sensitive to your needs.
✅ Spend quality time with you.
✅ Be financially responsible.
✅ Pray with you and for you.
✅ Make your home a safe place.
✅ Celebrate your accomplishments.
✅ Encourage and uplift you.
✅ Respect you always.
✅ Remain faithful to you alone.

Looking back, I wish I had known these things before saying “I do” the first time.

What do you think? Do you agree with this list, or would you add something? Drop your thoughts in the comments below!